I have been fortunate to work with a wonderful publisher, Tellwell Talent. The book has been published now for almost six months. The marketing consultant at Tellwell is providing me sage advice. My book has been entered in award competitions for 2020. It has participated in a giveaway through Goodreads, Amazon’s book focused social media arm. I have set up an author page on Facebook.

It has been suggested that I join grief groups in social media and set up an Instagram presence. I believe this is good advice, I truly do. But something gnaws at me.

I realize that I don’t want to be a pirate! If you are a Seinfeld fan, you may understand the reference. Let me explain.

The sitcom series Seinfeld is, for me, the best series every produced for television. Seinfeld is an institution in our home. Everything that happens in normal life has a reference in one of the episodes. I own the DVD set for all eight seasons and Crystle and I have watched every episode more times than I am able to count.

In one episode, Jerry gets himself into a situation where he has agreed to wear a puffy shirt because he said yes to a ‘low talker’ when he could not hear what she was asking. Kramer tells Jerry that the shirt is setting a new fashion trend that makes him look like a pirate.

“Jerry, you’re going to be the first pirate,” pleads Kramer.

To which Jerry replies forlornly, “but I don’t want to be a pirate!”

No, I don’t have a puffy shirt in my closet. But where I relate to Jerry is that I don’t want to be an expert in grief. I feel bad when I respond to Tellwell’s marketing team saying that I don’t want to do Instagram for grieving.

When I decided to write my book, it became a therapy for me. I felt it could help others to read about my walk through grief in an open and honest manner. But I never wanted to be the expert CNN calls when they have a story about grief.

Let me clarify, I am happy to listen to others as they walk through grief. Anyone who walks through grief becomes an unwilling expert. For those of us who have trod this path, we learn that the best thing we can do is simply listen, and perhaps share a hug.

I feel that this blog has run its course. I am not sure what new information I can offer on grief, because at this point in my journey, I feel my place is to listen rather than speak.

This website will continue to be my author page. I would like to write another book at some point. I plan to start a new blog focusing on spirituality. The link will appear on this web page and I will be more active, I think, on social media.

I hope you understand this does not mean I am leaving Crystle in my past. I try to live every day in the present moment, so each day the first thing I do is greet Crystle. I wear her wedding ring on a chain around my neck so it rests near my heart. She is coming with me on my new journey. I could not imagine living a day without her.